Funny Jokes

[bradrhale]

Iowa?? i was thinking more like Michigan.

[mudseeker]

hey! why i outa..........

[03chevy]

remember the trees
remember the grass
remember me
the pain in the a$$!!

[gmctrucks]

I found this one but it's good.
man in a corvette
A senior citizen in Florida bought a brand new red Corvette convertible.

He took off down the road, flooring it to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head. "This is great," he thought as he roared down I-75. He pushed the pedal to the metal even more.

Then he looked in his rear view mirror and saw a highway patrol trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. "I can get away from him with no problem" thought the man and he tromped it some more and flew down the road at over 100 mph. Then 110, 120 mph. Then he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing."

He pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the trooper to catch up with him. The trooper pulled in behind the Corvette and walked up to the man.

"Sir," he said, looking at his watch. "My shift ends in 30 minutes and today is Friday. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The man looked at the trooper and said, "Years ago my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper, and I thought you were bringing her back".

"Have a good day, Sir," said the trooper.

lmao

[76silverado]

LOL that is great, reminds me of my grandpa!

[mudseeker]

Husband Down
A Husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife. 'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies. 'Put them back, we can't afford them,' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it s half the price.'
On the PA system: 'Cleanup needed on aisle 25, we have a husband down'

[Pantharen]

An Alberta Indian picks up a hooker. 'How much do you charge for da hour, sister?' he asks.

'$100,' she replies.

He says 'Do you do Indian style?'

'No' she says.

' I pay you $200 to do him Indian style'

'No', she says, not knowing what Indian style is.

'I pay you $300'

'No', she says.

'I pay you $400'

'No', she says.

So finally he says, 'OK, I pay you $1,000 to do him Indian style.'

She thinks, 'Well, I've been in the game for over 10 years now. I've had every kind of request from weirdos from every part of the world.

How bad could Indian Style be?''.

So she agrees and has sex with him.They do it in every kind of way and in every possible position.

Finally, after several hours, they finish.Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says, 'Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting. But that was great. So what exactly is 'Indian style'?'









The Indian replies 'Now you send bill to Government'

[bradrhale]

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.

The Personnel Manager said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job."
Mujibar said, "I am ready."
The manager said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green."
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister manager, I am ready."
The manager said, "Go ahead."
Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'"
Mujibar now works as a technician at a call center for computer problems. No doubt you have spoken to him.

[mudseeker]

and hence, the creation of my sig.

[batty1214]

http://www.bannedinhollywood.com/top...rank-too-much/

now this is funny