Hey Silverhairdeere

vansdonk · 10-22-2009, 12:26 PM

Where are our morning jokes? I need a few laughs this morning. Don't make me go to another forum, I like your jokes.

silverhairdeere · 10-22-2009, 01:29 PM

the rectum stretcher

While I was Driving down the road the other day (7 miles over the limit), I passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"

I replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "What do you do?"

"I told him that I'm a rectum stretcher,"

The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."

"And just what the heck do you do with a 6 foot a-hole?" he asked.

"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."

Traffic Ticket $95.00

Court Costs. $45.00

The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS

shd

vansdonk · 10-22-2009, 02:58 PM

Thanks!!! That was funny.

gmctrucks · 10-22-2009, 09:48 PM

I heard some today from my doctor but I can't post them.

vansdonk · 10-23-2009, 09:18 AM

Ya, it's hard to read a sentence with little *&^%$$&* in it.

10-22-2009, 12:26 PM	#1
vansdonk Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: NW Washington Posts: 94	Hey Silverhairdeere Where are our morning jokes? I need a few laughs this morning. Don't make me go to another forum, I like your jokes. __________________ '69 Series IIA 109 '74 MGB '04 Disco II

10-22-2009, 01:29 PM	#2
silverhairdeere Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: land between the lakes tn Posts: 1,184	the rectum stretcher While I was Driving down the road the other day (7 miles over the limit), I passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?" I replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "What do you do?" "I told him that I'm a rectum stretcher," The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide." "And just what the heck do you do with a 6 foot a-hole?" he asked. "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..." Traffic Ticket $95.00 Court Costs. $45.00 The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS shd Last edited by silverhairdeere; 10-22-2009 at 02:03 PM.

10-22-2009, 02:58 PM	#3
vansdonk Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: NW Washington Posts: 94	Thanks!!! That was funny. __________________ '69 Series IIA 109 '74 MGB '04 Disco II

10-23-2009, 09:18 AM	#5
vansdonk Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: NW Washington Posts: 94	Ya, it's hard to read a sentence with little &^%$$& in it. __________________ '69 Series IIA 109 '74 MGB '04 Disco II

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10-22-2009, 09:48 PM	#4
gmctrucks Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Houston,Texas Posts: 4,035	I heard some today from my doctor but I can't post them.