I hate this time year but its worse this time

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by dirtrider73068, Dec 8, 2017.

  1. dirtrider73068

    dirtrider73068 Senior Moderator
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    Laid my grandmother to rest yesterday, it was gloomy and rainy, go figure. She had a good service surrounded by those that loved her. My mom found her "lucky beans" and gave me one to have as a keepsake, will carry it with me maybe it will bring me luck. I have two of her progam papers going to cut each in half and find some pretty trim and attempt to make a picture frame to put them in and have a memorial to remember her by.

    I did ok up to the point at the end when you walk up to say final goodbyes and lost it, I broke down hard all but collapsed on her casket it was really hard. Today I haven't felt like doing much but juse mope around and stare into space. I may be much help here for a while but will put in where I can.
     
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  2. WideTheF#%Open

    WideTheF#%Open Full Member

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    #22 WideTheF#%Open, Dec 20, 2017
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2017
    Over the years, I've lost good friends and beloved family members, and it's never easy... seeing my mom go was the hardest of all, but, like your grandma, my mom lived a long full life. Had its ups and downs, of course, but I like to think we shared more good times than bad, despite being placed in dire straits when my dad split. After a long ugly haul, we eventually reached a point where we could live in relative comfort and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. From all you've told us about your grandma, I reckon she was that kind of person: sensible enough to have her priorities straight and enjoy the simple pleasures, like gardening and raising vegetables and cooking good things in the kitchen. A woman of the soil, and I say that with the utmost respect---my mom also loved to putter around her garden and plant things here and there, it was like second nature to her, she had a green thumb when it came to growing things. Moi, all I ever grew were sinsemilla spears, but they usually turned out well, LOL. :eek:

    And those soap operas your grandma used to watch? Well, there's no law against them, LOL... at least your grandma wasn't out cooking meth or stealing cars. Hopefully you'll find the humor in that line, even though your heart is heavy at this moment. Grieving is important too... raw as it feels now, mourning is an essential step in the process. To me, it also shows honor and respect, and the world could use more of those two things nowadays, believe me. To this day, there are times when I cry over my deceased mom: far less often, to be sure, but it still happens. I even watch "Lawrence Welk" now and then in her memory, and get this: in the kitchen, I have a photo of my mom taped to the inside of a cabinet, I put it there so I could occasionally say "Hello" to her, and I always turn that cabinet door outward so my mom can "see" the TV screen through the doorway, it's like watching the program with her back in the day, 10-4? I've never told anybody that I do this, and I don't really care what people think, my mom always liked that program and I won't deny her spirit anything. :woot:

    HANG IN THERE, DR, AND DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO THERE IN THE SOONER STATE... THINGS WILL GET EASIER IN TIME, WHEN YOU ARE NO LONGER OVERWHELMED BY GRIEF. :slow:
     
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  3. gmctrucks

    gmctrucks Full Member

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    dr you hang in there buddy again sorry to hear about grandma.
     
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  4. dirtrider73068

    dirtrider73068 Senior Moderator
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    I am hanging in there, I don't want to do anything but be a brick in the bed. I really should do something but don't want to. My girlfriends aunt wants me to hang some christmas lights which would get paid for it, and to top it off my cell phone got shut off last night, its prepaid and they should have sent me a text saying my bill was due and never did so I forgot it was due. Don't really have the money to pay it till midnight tonight when check gets deposited or I go ahead and pay it with what I have left in the bank and just take a overdraft hit on my account.

    I just don't know what to do or how to get through this easier or faster or make it better, its just awful.
     
  5. MikeG

    MikeG Full Member

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    @dirtrider73068 , really sorry for the struggles, it will get better. Here's a question to ask yourself, Would your Grandma want you just mopping around? What would she want you to be doing?

    I know the loss of a loved one is hard and everyone grieves in there own way. Those were the types of thoughts I had when I lost my father, grandparents, and other people I cared about. Maybe they will help you..........?

    Unless your phone is an absolute must, I'd wait. Over Draft fees really suck. It's a load of chit when we've paid more in OD fees than the cost of what ever was bought or paid for.
     
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  6. dirtrider73068

    dirtrider73068 Senior Moderator
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    A new year and a new start, I am kinda getting past my grandmothers passing now it still hurts when I think about her. I have one her whats called a lucky bean I carry with me everyday when I start to feel down I reach in my pocket and hand on to it and rub and makes me feel better, there was a coupl days I didn't take it with me and bad days so maybe its bringing me luck every since I keep with me in my pocket I have been having good days.

    I still plan getting a locket to put my and her picture in to wear and trying to plan up a picture frame to make to one of her pictures in and her obit programs from her funeral in one as well, just taking my time with it so its nice and I make it right and perfect.
     
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